“Bloody” Scientific!

“Oh Honey! I cannot come this time for Ganapati at your place. You know the monthlies ….Sorry. See you later. Bye” and she hung the call. I was appalled to hear these words from her, more so, because I thought her to be a modern girl.

Yes, she is modern. She wears the clothes of “her” choosing. She goes out whenever “she” wants to, hangs out with her guy friends in pubs, uses every available social media platform, is supportive of LGBT community even encourages Live-in relationship. This made me think that she is modern in true sense, not just in her lifestyle but in her thoughts as well.

So when I heard these words from her, I could not take it well. I mean how one can think like that. I came home and told my Mom about this. I told her that my dear friend is not coming at our place for Ganapati because she is on her periods.

Periods, menses, chums, birthday, monthlies, ladies’ curse etc. are just other names for menstruation. It is nothing but a regular discharge of blood and mucosal tissue from the inner lining of the uterus through the vagina. It usually indicates puberty in females and continues till menopause. Bleeding happens within cycle of 21 to 31 days. It is “bloody” scientific, natural and as simple as that. Why to make big fuss about it???

I asked my Mom the same and she was like, “This is how we girls, women are raised and cultured in our Indian Society. I know this is wrong. But you really can’t do much about it.” I pondered over it.

In our culture, with menses come more and more restrictions on a girl. Every single act of yours is monitored. And every damn thing is restricted in the name of God, religion and customs. Let alone temple, you are not even allowed to visit your own kitchen; no worship only hardships. Also you are made to sit, eat and sleep separately. You are treated as “untouchable” in your own house. And this makes no sense to me. Trust me, I have personally never suffered this but I have observed these things happening with my friends and even with my cousins.  

Oh look how fool I am! I forgot we are not a society who thinks rationally or “scientifically” but one which thinks “religiously” emotionally. But even then it makes zero sense to me. What is wrong with this society and the people and even with the females who support all this non-sense shit?

I tried my best to rationalize this behavior and these customs. I could conclude that back then when no good quality hygienic tools were available, such kind of “untouchability” was still justified. But now when better hygienic options like sanitary pads, tampons, menstrual cups are available, now when we have relatively more liberty to do things, even then why do we have to cling to these out-dated customs and shitty ideas surrounding the menses. Yes, shitty ideas, because so called liberal religions term menses to be “profane”, “bad”, “impure”.

It is such an insane thing to call menses as impure. Under this garb of impurity, society has systematically discriminated its women; moreover has been successful in imbibing that menses are something bad and profane. THIS IS ALL NOTHING BUT A PIECE OF SHITTY STUFF! I can never buy this idea. And if my custom, my religion asks me to do as it says, I am glad to unfollow it.

But then I cannot blame women for this understanding or thinking they have about menses. They are part of this “scientifically backward” and “superstitiously modern” society. They are rarely given education about it. Only moms, aunties, elder sisters, grandmas in the house are supposed to teach the young girl in the house about menses and that too when she gets one (not prior to that)! It really makes no sense.  By doing this, the topic of menses has been made taboo not just in house but also in society.

I was lucky, in this regard. When I was 12 or 13 years old, it was my Dad who made me understand what menses are in a scientific way. He also spoke about biological, psychological and physiological changes that were bound to happen in me. He made sure I was ready for it. And when I got my first menses, he was the one to get me pads. There is nothing to be ashamed of, he said. That is how my parents raised me.

I was once told by someone that you are not supposed to go temples, worship and all during menses. And I purposefully did all that stuff while on menses. I wanted to see what might possibly go wrong and I was also waiting to see if any God punish me. But nothing like that happened. (Hence proved, those shitty customs were just to subjugate females.)

I know things take time to change. But on this particular aspect, am unable to see any substantial improvement. Foremost important thing is, to change mind-set. One needs to understand that menses are natural process. They are the bodily scientific mechanism and no curse. And yes, no Holy God punishes you for having menses. After all it is Mother Nature who has made us like that. Why to feel ashamed of it.

I personally find menses to be indicator of proper, healthy functioning body. Many times I tried speaking on the topic with my sisters, friends. One thing I have observed, my guy friends find nothing unusual about it. It is my female friends who find this topic to be “awkward”, “taboo”. This way, nothing is going to change. And I want all these friends and sisters to understand that if change has to happen, it has to start from self.

I want them to understand and convince their own-self that menstruation is no bad thing. It is natural. Yes it is okay to bleed. Unfollow and break those customs/ traditions which bar you or belittle you for being you. You are above all that. Mother Nature is no fool to choose you and give you substantial responsibility of procreation.